Chapter X – Part 3

$ I haven’t filled in all gaps.
$ Why don’t we have a look at this together.
$ Sure.
$ Where are the most gaps left?
$ In 9 – fame, reputation.
$ What shows up in 9 is a result of what happened in 1; what you see in 7 has its roots in 3. Let’s discuss it according to this chronology if it’s ok with you.
$ Number one. Career, life mission. I don’t have the slightest idea what my mission is. Provided that I have one.
$ Who doesn’t?
$ I just think… Sometimes it seems to me that people talk about their mission, their vocation etc. when they want to force feed the value of their life because they find themselves such a waste of space. Whether my life is valuable or valueless, I don’t give a shit. Besides, who would be supposed to judge this? I just want to live a nice life, with dignity. To have fun, not to tire too much and not to get ill. Why am I to start from the very top, life missions and bla bla bla?
$ Thank you for this remark. “Life mission” may sound grandiloquent so let’s find a more user-friendly term. I will suggest an exercise from Stephen Covey’s 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. Let me read it out aloud for you:
In your mind’s eye, see yourself going to the funeral parlor or chapel, parking the car, and getting out. As you walk inside the building, you notice the flowers, the soft organ music. You see the faces of friends and family you pass along the way. You feel the shared sorrow of losing, the joy of having known, that radiates from the hearts of the people there. As you walk down to the front of the room and look inside the casket, you suddenly come face to face with yourself. This is your funeral, three years from today. All these people have come to honor you, to express feelings of love and appreciation for your life. As you take a seat and wait for the services to begin, you look at the program in your hand. There are to be four speakers. The first one is from your family, immediate and also extended — children, brothers, sisters, nephews, nieces, aunts, uncles, cousins, and grandparents who have come from all over the country to attend. The second speaker is one of your friends, someone who can give a sense of what you were as a person. The third speaker is from your work or profession. And the fourth is from your church or some community organization where you’ve been involved in service. Now think deeply. What would you like each of these speakers to say about you and your life? What kind of husband, wife, father, or mother would you like their words to reflect? What kind of son or daughter or cousin? What kind of friend? What kind of working associate? What character would you like them to have seen in you? What contributions, what achievements would you want them to remember? Look carefully at the people around. What difference would you like to have made in their lives?
How are you?
$ It was tough to me. Do you know how I recognized it was?
$ Tell me.
$ I could focus solely on the details of the ceremony. And I drew a conclusion that has been growing in me since my grandfather died.

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