Chapter IX – Part 3

$ Do you have the impression that the first place is reserved for his mother, the second place for your daughter and you’re only in the third place?

$ If not in the fourth.

$ I beg your pardon.

$ I mean his carrier.

$ I’m so relieved.

$ And it drives me mad that in a way I don’t do anything: the daughter is at school, we have a housekeeper and in spite of this I keep being busy and I can’t see any result of so much effort.

$ Do you feel frustrated with the housewife’s role?

$ Bloody hell! Of course! And on the one hand I know I have to take care of the house because I have a husband and a daughter and no job; on the other hand, I am all fired up when my working single friends envy me and say: you’re so lucky: a loving husband who makes money, you have no financial worries, and a healthy, charming baby.

$ Do you feel sad because they don’t understand you?

$ That’s right. And in all this I deluded myself that learning French would be my perfect getaway, that I would better manage time for the sake of the beautiful melody of the language, for the joy of learning and for the perspective of speaking it in France. I hoped that making progress would bring me on to work more so that what made me angry in my everyday routine wouldn’t have such an impact on my mood.

$ To sum up, learning French was supposed to be an affair with a virtual knight in whose arms you wanted to forget your worries and see the world in the colors of the rainbow.

$ Go, laugh at me.

$ Have I hurt you with this metaphor?

$ A little. I mean, it’s very pertinent because not only don’t I fly away like in the arms of a dream lover while learning languages, but also I feel disappointed with the fact that I can’t read, distinguish vowels, I can’t hear what they say in the scripts recorded on CDs and I don’t remember what I have learned.

$ A little digression. Have a look at this, please.

$ My attendance list. So what?

$ Which session is it today?

$ 9th.

$ After 8 sessions you want to know everything: how to read, how to infallibly distinguish vowels, clearly hear what they say and remember everything.

$ Because I know I’m the one to blame. At the first meeting we set, I mean, I estimated that I am able to study French one hour a day. And of course I am. I am able to study French longer. But, firstly, I don’t get organized to do it. And secondly, if I do get organized, I am so defocused that as a matter of fact I could just forget studying French. The result would be the same.

$ You told me you attended yoga classes at ‘Harmony’ and besides you practice at home.

$ That’s right.

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